1womp (1womp) wrote,

What Is Really Real?

November 24, 2009 - Here's the thing; I may have moved on. Maybe. I don't really know, but it seems like I no longer have that internal need to post entries in the ol' WOMP-Blog. I still have the desire to do so, but the need seems to have ebbed. Why? Heck, I don't even know why I began a blog in the first place. I have always purported that it was to keep interested people informed of my cartoonish efforts. If I could admit it, I'd say that it really may have been that I'd hoped to impress strangers with my sparkling wit and deathless insights. Whatever the reasons, actual or supposed, they apparently have little sway over me anymore. Even as my circle of e-friends was increasing, I think I began to feel that I was blogging just to blog. Of course, my health and work concerns played a role in my lengthy laconic lapses of late, but my most recent spat of silence seems to stem from a sense of being in a bit of a bubble. The whole thing reminds me of some of my childhood imaginings about the nature of reality. As I'd walk home from school, I'd often wonder how I could know that the world around me wasn't really an elaborate mirage, orchestrated by mysterious forces with inscrutable motivations to hide the truth that I was really the only living being on Earth (if I was even on Earth at all). I suppose that every kid has some similar ego-infused Truman Show style dream. Back then, I'm sure that my comic book and science fiction reading, coupled with a lifelong general sense of loneliness, made me ask "what is really real?" Today, "what is really real" is even harder to define. Much of self-promotion (the apparent purpose of The WOMP-Blog) is also self-encouragement, if not self-delusion. By attempting to convince others that you are doing something worthy of their interest, you often are convincing yourself as well (or are, at least, re-enforcing a conviction). For whatever reason (and I suspect it is the specter of death that has hung over my shoulder during the last year or so), I'm no longer able to efficiently delude myself into ignoring my many inadequacies nor the unlikelihood of my success, and I really have nothing to market other than stacks of yellowing pulp, so "what is really real" has become less obvious. So, I may have moved on. Maybe. You see, beyond all of that, there is still some weird little spark-thing that keeps me going, like a far-off lost hiker sending out an S.O.S. with a tiny mirror reflecting the sun. So here I am, reflecting on the recent sixth anniversary of the "founding" of the ol' WOMP-Blog. Yep, back in November of 2003 I began my informative, self-promoting, ego-infused, marketing delusion with a weak posting about comic book creators and football players. In the hundreds of posts since, I have waxed poetic, waned prophetic, and complained pathetic. I've talked about history, artistry, and an artery. I've even produced a few entries of which I'm somewhat proud. In reviewing the past posts, it's also pretty obvious that they add up to a great big question; "what is really real?" Just like when I was a kid, the question has no "real" answer. There is no way to know whether or not the world is a ruse. All you can do is accept that a degree of uncertainty - in all matters - is the only thing that is truly "really real," and then...move on. So, I guess I will. Whatever that will mean I can't begin to know right now, but I certainly hope that it doesn't mean that I will go another two-plus months without posting at least something. Sorry about that. If I can, I'll try to fill you in on some recent misadventures. If I can't, I won't. Either way, I'll move on. See ya!

Tags: comic books

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